Jeff Justice
Conflict Management
In Lorraine Segal’s video, she states that there will always be conflict. Conflict can be good or bad. Accept that conflict happens. Conflicts will arise. You don’t need to blame yourself or someone else if you disagree. Instead, as a manager you can keep an open mind to focus on solutions.
Manage your own emotions and responses. This is toughest for me. This is my “hot button”. Are they saying or doing something that makes you want to react!? Chances are the intensity of your reaction has to do with past experiences, not just the current problem. You must be able to separate past conflict from the present situation, this will help you stay calm and present.
I’ve been a manager for 5 years. When conflicts arises, often the manager has to make the first move toward resolution. Make the first move, even if you think it is their fault and they should be the first to act. Do it anyway, and you might get the benefits.
As mentioned in the video, be willing to listen. Each of us has our own way of framing and describing our experience. When we recognize that they have a different story about what happened, and become willing to listen to and understand their perspective, we can see more clearly how we got to this point and how we might resolve the conflict.
Take responsibility for your part. Did you do something wrong that affected someone else, lose your temper, or hurt someone’s feelings? I know I make mistakes often. If you are willing to acknowledge your part, instead of reacting defensively, it can help in resolving conflict. This doesn’t mean taking all the responsibility, but recognizing what you did that contributed to the problem.
It takes a lot of practice and willingness to become aware of your assumptions about the other person, and to change your behaviors and ways of thinking about conflict.
Khawand, P. (2014, June 06). Effective Strategies to Manage Conflict at Work [Video File]. Retrieved May 25, 2017, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8_n-QGwh-E
Great post. After watching Segal’s video and hearing her say conflict is natural it made sense. I like how you point out that if you are willing to do your part instead of reacting defensively this will help resolve conflict. This is true as I have tried this method with my spouse when we have a disagreement. Before I point the finger at him or it gets too heated, I acknowledge and apologize for anything I have done to contribute. Slowing down and thinking before reacting is helpful.
Whenever the word “conflict” is brought up, usually it has a negative connotation. Like discussed in Segal’s video, it’s not always a bad thing. Sometimes conflict can be constructive and result in an improved process. Your hot button is relatable, it’s hard to not respond to someone who is being confrontational. Having a handle on our own emotions and staying neutral is sometimes hard to keep in mind.